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Sweet innocent trojan Hero O.J. Simpson is in jail for 10 Felonies? He MUST have been framed.
Haven't the Las Vegas Police heard? Have they been living in a Desert Cave? O.J. isn't a criminal -- He's a lovable celebrity Heisman Trophy Winner. He would never hurt a fly... or kidnap a fly...or double-murder a fly.
So what if they have the entire crime on audio tape? Why would that be any more damning than DNA? O.J.'s not afraid of no mp3 -- Not when he can beat the microscopic analysis of the blueprint of life.
Even with Johnnie Cockring resting in peace (or burning in hell, depending on your "perspective"), this is gearing up to be "The Trial of the Century" for the 21st Century.
Are you ready for Simpson's Halloween Special? It's pretty scary when O.J. and his henchman come into your Hotel Room with guns blazing, and it might sound bad when O.J. tells his victims that no one's leaving the room until he gets what he wants, but there's a perfectly logical explanation for all the guns, threats, and Gangsta "Mother-F'ers" getting thrown around the room: They were just making an episode of O.J.'s new reality show, "Juic'd," where O.J. shocks a Memorabilia Dealer into a near-fatal Heart Attack.
And now they are accusing O.J. of HIDING FUNDS FROM THE GOLDMANS through a secret offshore account, with evidence pointing to hundreds of thousands in unreported earnings.
Yeah? Well, PROVE IT. And have fun in Antigua. O.J. will be back in circulation any minute, somehow enjoying all the luxuries of life, while claiming poverty. Investigators are now looking in to his $15,000 wristwatch, as a possible way to chip away at his monetary debt to his victims' families. His Confession book is the #1 Bestseller, so what O.J. said would happen over his dead body is happening now: The Goldmans are receving money from O.J.'s work.
The whole thing is a giant conspiracy against poor O.J. He is now facing 100 years in Prison. And all it is, IS A MAKE-UP CALL.
Can you believe that for Double-Murder, he does no time, and for taking back his football, he may do Life?
How could there be a HIT taken out on Kevin Federline, while Goldman just sells books and goes after watches?
But the USC Football team won, so this is just another week to be PROUD to be a trOJan.
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Click here for fan reaction to O.J., and the ESPN FUSC
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